Woman left torn after discovering boyfriend of eight months is married with kids

A mum has opened up about her heartbreak after finding out her soldier boyfriend of eight months is actually married with kids.

The anonymous mum, believed to be from the UK, was “devastated” when she found out her partner has been cheating on her – after learning his real name online.

She lifted the lid in a candid post on popular parenting website, Mumsnet, where she asked fellow parents for advice.

Now she’s considering whether or not it’s appropriate for her to break the news to the wife of her romance.

Some felt like the man’s spouse should need to know, while others thought it was a better idea to just walk away from the situation.

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The woman wrote: “Feeling a little devastated at the moment and not really sure what to do. I have been dating a man in the military for around eight months now.

“We spend pretty much all our time together and he stays at mine most nights. The only time he goes away is once a fortnight, when he goes to his ‘parents’ for the weekend.

“He didn’t seem to do any social media, so I didn’t really get to suss him out when we first started dating.”

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After expressing that she wasn’t interested in a cheat – the unfaithful man claimed with his military background he hasn’t been able to sustain a long-term relationship.

The mum continued: “He told me he’d just recently come out of a short-term relationship in which he’d been cheated on and I opened up being cheated on in the past.

“I told him how much I hated cheats, probably until I was blue in the face.”

After searching him online and finding an old article about him, she discovered he was also using a fake name.

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She explained: “He has a totally different name to the one I know and the article mentioned a wife and child.

“I typed that name into Facebook and there he is as a supposedly happy family man – married since 2008. He is very much still married as they have recent photos together.

“I’m very certain that I'm not his first affair as his stories about all his exes are just too realistic and there are no inconsistencies whenever he brings them up.

“So I believe that those relationships happened. Obviously anything between this man and myself will be over when I next see him. Now I'm stuck though… Do I tell his wife or not?”

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Many other women felt that the wife deserved to know and insisted she would have a clear conscience if she told the truth.

One advised: “Absolutely you should tell her. It's obviously a hard thing to do and awkward but she doesn't deserve to be lied to and cheated on.”

Another added: “Tell the wife. This culture of cheating in military families is abhorrent and outdated. Tell her.”

While others told her to forget everything and walk away in order to avoid the mess of a broken marriage.

A Mumsnet user explained: “I think you'd be telling her from a place of hurt and anger. I wouldn't tell her, just walk away.”

Another added: “I think you’d be doing it for the wrong reasons and won’t get any thanks. I’d walk away.”

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